Q. We have invited our just married cousins to the bris mila of our son. (There should B’H be many simchas by all). I was told that if we add some more food to the seudas habris, we can recite sheva brochos, which would be very beautiful since some of the out of town guest to the wedding will be staying for the bris also. We have some questions in regard to the above. Firstly, is this the correct thing to do? And how much more food do we have to add? Does the same apply to a bar mitzva?
A. Poskim disagree. Meiri (Kesuvos 7b) maintains, that we do not recite sheva brochos unless the seuda is done for the honor and benefit of the recently married couple. Orchos Chaim (H. Birchaz Hamazon 61) quotes a similar opinion from the Raved, and therefore we do not recite sheva brochos by a bris mila. Imrei Dovid (40) also opines that unless the meal is totally dedicated for the newlyweds. no sheva brochos should be recited.
However, Ohalei Yeshurun (4: 5) quotes from Igrois Moshe that when the chosson – kallah eat a meal at a restaurant, where food is always anyway served, if it is announced that this is a meal honoring them and they are seated at a place that reflects that it is for their simcha and joy, we do recite sheva brochos.
Ezer Mikodesh (62: 8) asserts the same, if extra food is added in deference to the new couple. Moadim Uzemanim (3: 246: n. p. 113) adds that the same applies even when only chasuna songs and dances are included.
Sovea S’mochos (p. 36), Miyam Hahalacha (2: 73), and others maintain that the same applies to a bar mitzva.
Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that if a separate table is set for the chosson- kallah, preferably in an adjacent room, and they have their own minyan with ponim chadoshos seating with them, they can recite sheva brochos.
Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit’a