Q. My mother passed away on 12 Sivan the funeral was on 14 Sivan , 5771/ 2010. What is the last day I have to say Kadish and what is the day of the first Yahrzeit?
A. Kadish, as you know, is said for only eleven months, as a sign of respect in considering our parents as righteous and not having the need of full twelve months of it’s recital (Remah 376,4). As Kadish was recited first after the funeral, that is when the eleven months began. Since this is a leap year, Kadish should be recited until and including Mincha of the 13 of Nissan.
Traditions and prohibitions of Aveluth, (mourning), begin also at the day of the funeral and they are kept for twelve months only, even in a leap year (Y.D. 391,2). In this case they will end at the end of the 13 of Iyar, that is a month before the Yohrzait.
Yohrzait, is the date of decease, not the day of burial, (O.C. 568,8). This gave rise to different opinions as to what should be done when, more than two days elapse from the day of death and the day of burial. Since we could face a situation where the Yohrzait precedes the end of Aveluth, and a mistake could occur by terminating early Aveluth, some Poiskim opine, that the first Yohrzait, should then be also the day of burial and not the day of death. (Shach Y.D. 402, 3). The accepted Minhag is that if only two days elapsed from death to burial, even on the first year the Yohrzait is the day of decease. Of course in a leap year, this mistake would not occur, so the 12 of Sivan is the day of Yohrzait.
Rabbi Abraham Bartfeld as revised by Horav Shlomo Miller Shlit”a
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