Q. This coming Sunday is Nitel night (Christmas). I have an old family minhag not to learn Torah during that night. I was invited to a wedding on that night, Is it proper for me to attend?

A. On question 960 regarding getting married on Nitel night we wrote;
“Horav Shlomo Miller’s Shlit’a opinion is that for those that observe the minhag of Nitel, it depends on the rationale behind it.
If the reason is the inherent avelus and mourning on a day that caused historically so much pain and tragedy to our people, (Korban Nesanel, Chasam Sofer 2) weddings should be avoided.

Nitei Gavriel (Nisuin 1: 48: 18 – Chanuka 5: 4) indeed quotes opinions that some avoid getting married on Nitel night; that being also one reason why we don’t learn Torah on that night, as Torah learning creates simcha and joy.

However, if the motive for Nitel is the habitual Sakana or danger for Jews being in the streets on that night, (Taamey Haminhogim) it may not apply in our days. Interestingly, Nitei Gavriel (Chanuka 48: 18) rules that even for the people who are stringent in keeping the Nitel traditions the y can get married then.

Rabbi A. Bartfeld as revised by Horav Dovid Pam, Horav Aharon Miller and Horav Chanoch Ehrentreu Shlit’a